getting started!

i'm ready to get back on track with this. i've had 630 calories today, which i think is pretty good for my first day of really getting back into this. i have so much motivation now that i've seen the spring break pictures. my bff is gaining weight like its her job, so my hope is to be skinnier than her by summer :) she's always been smaller than me, and i'd love to beat her! any suggestions on a calorie plan to get started on? nothing too hard, my main focus is control right now !

?

well spring break was alot of fun.
i got to stay with my friend, and we had alot of fun, not much to say about it. i stayed pretty active (volleyball everyday) and didnt eat much. i was having a great time, but on thursday night i wanted to party. i was out with three of my friends (whom i'd been hanging out with the whole time) went into town and called up a couple seniors who were staying in their own condo that had loads of alcohol. we couldnt stay long, so i drank as much as i possibly could. then my parents came to get me and i was sooo wasted, of course they found out. my best friend didnt get into any trouble because she didnt drink, and my other friends that did have parents who dont care. anyways i'm in alot of trouble. how can i make my parents forgive me?

ps. i havent been eating much... i'm mad at myself...

ugh. my mom annoys the fucking hell out of me.
she can wreck any day, no matter how great, all in a matter of minutes. the woman is truly gifted. anyways, instead of spending spring break with my lovingly detatched parents, and little brother, i'll be with my bff. she doesnt really party much but whatever. we'll still have fun. cant wait to get out there and party it up. leaving tommorrow at 5 so i should probably go. cant wait to ditch this town.

*tearsnsorrow,
thank you for being my first follower! i've followed your blog for quite a while now and i really admire you! if you ever wanna talk just let me know! thanks again! <3 you beautifulll

fail...

ate like a fatass today.
i just keep telling myself i'm going to fail anyways cause of spring break next week. maybe i should just watch what i eat as best i can then have fun for that week? then i'll have an excuse to be extra hard on myself ;) yeah, that sounds good. i'll just do a detox for the next two days for a flat tummy, have some fun, then get right back into it :)
stay strong everyone!

been gone awhile but i'm ready to start up again!
i got asked to prom today by a senior :D yay. so i wanna be looking extra thin in my dress. i have lots of motivation! i think for now i'm gonna stick to 600 cals a day and get more intense in two weeks when spring break is over. i want a sexy belly for the beach ;) got some hot clothes and ready for sun, surf, and BOYS ! :)

today:
fruit- 110
turkey slice-15
yogurt-80
205 total

awesome day.

suprise, suprise!
the sexy kid i talked about ealier, brett, is nothing but a dick. his friend told me he was talking to five other girls. sweeeet. so i went on a bike ride and decided to weigh in. 162. holy fuck. i cant remember ever being over 151! something has got to change. maybe its muscle, i thought. i went and got dressed for the movie (which i went to with my bitchy friend) and didnt fit into my jeans. something has got to change. if i had followers i'd ask for their advice, but i guess i'm on my own with this one lol. i'm thinking six hundred calories a day, with lots of excersice, and i'm gonna aim for 7 pounds in two weeks. then its gonna get harder, hopefully. damn, i just cant believe i've let myself go this much. i'm about to start having softball practice everyday after school for two hours, so at least that'll be a steady workout i have to do. then i plan on doing some more at home.

spring break is in like 4 weeks. shit. i wish i would've started this earlier. now all i can do is look at the perfect victorias secret models and not eat. wish me luck!

i would also like to say that i was deeply saddened my ana's girls' last post. i've always read her blog and i support her 100%. i'm very glad she's happy, but i don't know how i'll get through the day without reading her posts:(

i really want to commit to this.
i'm going to try.

this week has been crazy.
i had a dance on saturday, and i was just looking at the
pictures, and i realized that my legs are skinnier than my perfect best friends (diane*)! oh happy day haha:) we never fight, but she's been a real bitch lately. my mom loves her so she sides with her and tells me that i need to be nice. but i can't stand all the constant put downs. she's two faced too. one of my other friends, allie, whom i we party with sometimes, is kinda crazy and wanted to spring break with us. diane acts like she wants to party with her, but being the funsucker she is, she doesnt even like drinking. then when allie couldnt come, she was like, omg that suckks we were gonna have so much fun! (to her face). but then to everyone else she's so happy she's not coming. bitch. stop being rude. lol sorry i went on a little rant there. but anyway, at the dance one of my friends brought this guy thats 2 years older than me (and extremely sexy) and he was all over me! now he's texting me all the time and wants to hang out, its perfect. in fact, i think we're going to a movie tonight;)

anyway, my eating habits right now are just suppper healthy. i don't binge. i just eat healthy stuff all the time. i've cut out sweets, fast food, and pop. i havent had any of those in three weeks and i feel great! i can just feel my thighs getting thinner everyday. and the best part is the envious eyes of all your friends when you have the strength to say no to the sugar shit that they cant resist ;) ah i love it. pleaseeeeeeeeee dont think that i'm not pro ana just because i dont eat the same as you. i still support you guys and i'm not gonna yell at you and tell you youre being stupid! i love reading the blogs:) you guys have such a drive! please "follow me" so i can read all your blogs!